I was in a really dark place. Again.

You know the place where the hopelessness gets so heavy that your mind starts wandering somewhere it shouldn’t.

And my mom looked at me and said the thing I hated most:

“Don’t go there.”

Not, “you poor thing.”

Not “that’s so unfair.”

Just don’t go there. Don’t let yourself spiral.

I literally wanted to scream, because I wanted to sit in the pit of my own misery. And I wanted her to agree that my life was terrible. That it was too much. But she wouldn’t. She didn’t.

Looking back, as much as I hated to hear it, it might have saved my life.

Here’s the thing: mental health is in my genetics.

A few years ago I had my DNA mapped. At the top of my list of predispositions was nearly every mental health condition you could label.

Honestly, I wasn’t suprised. It made sense of things I was already feeling. Not to mention, depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation run deep in my lineage. I’ve even felt my own tug toward these things at different points in my life.

Obviously, I’ve spent plenty of time sitting in the pit of my own problems.

At the same time, I also have changed my views quite drastically on what the world highlights as our problems. And I don’t think we talk about this enough. We don’t talk about what we can do to change it. Instead, we believe stories that make us assume we are victims of life.

I wish I'd known earlier, but we have more choice in how our story goes than we realize.

I didn’t always grasp it in my mom’s advice because I was too busy being angry that she wouldn’t let me stay in the place I secretly hated.

Can we take a moment to be astonished by how hard we work to stay in the places we hate?

It’s literally so much work to maintain a story that we hate. And yet it’s the message that is all around us. A message welcoming our brokenness, and not okayness, to the point where we’re living in a world where being okay leaves you feeling guilty that you’re not okay.

That if you’re not broken, then you’re crazy.

I just cannot.

Side Note: A Very Unpopular Opinion

This is going to sound startling and very much against what you’ve been taught, but I believe the natural pull of life is ALWAYS TOWARD THE GOOD.

Toward healing. Toward rising. Toward bettering.

Let me prove it using your body.

Every second of every day, your body is working toward health and balance. It’s working to create and maintain homeostasis. To create and maintain health. Of course, it doesn’t always feel that way, but that’s not because your body isn’t working for it. It’s doing the best with what you’ve given it.

And it’s not just your body. We see this play out in our enviornment and even in our lives. It’s actually harder to stay broken and live out brokenness than it is to be healed.

That doesn’t mean brokenness doesn’t exist. Obviously it does and always will. But it was never supposed to be the story. And we’re living as if it’s the ONLY story.

Can I remind you, this is against Biblical theology. Brokenness was never the main character. Healing, wholeness, and salvation were.

Which is why I want to remind you: YOU have options.

It’s okay to be okay!

The option that my mom has presented to me a number of times. And the option I am so desperate for you to know….

YOU DON’T HAVE TO GO THERE.

YOU CAN CHOOSE SOMETHING DIFFERENT.

You don’t have to keep fighting life and making it harder than you need. You can. But you also don’t have to.

You don’t have to spiral. You don’t have to go there. You can choose a different path. You can change the story. And you can stop living out of the worst thing that happened or the thing you hate most about yourself.

In fact, you were made for more than this.

And you shouldn’t feel guilty for choosing it. It’s okay to be okay. In fact, it’s more than okay!

That doesn’t make the wrong right.

Now that doesn’t discount the terrible things that have happened to you. None of this makes those right. It’s really a message that those things don’t have to be the main character of your story, even if they were part of it.

Just like I had to realize that depression, anxiety, and suicide, while part of my story, don’t have to be THE story.

Which is why I want to give you permission to return to being okay. Permission to change the story from the worst thing that happened, or the thing you hate most about yourself, to what you are here for.

And can you imagine the world if more people did this? Lived out of their purpose instead of their problems?

You can hate me, like I hated my mom for telling me this, because once you know different, it’s no longer an excuse. It’s a choice. Which means you’re always choosing a story to live out. The question is, what story are you choosing?

Also, credit to my mom: Mom, you were right!

Let me help you change the story…

Listen to this week’s podcast, How I Stopped Living Out of the Worst Thing That Happened to Me.

Yes, we heard you loud and clear. The Podcast is officially back.

I hope you’ll take a listen. And while you’re at it, hit subscribe! Shows are launching every week.

LISTEN HERE!

Want to do this work together?

Obviously, I’m passionate about this story work change, because it literally changed my entire life. Which is why I want to invite you to a Freedom Story Workshop.

Your brokenness is welcome, but we won’t let it stay. We’re changing the story.

Inside the workshop, we’ll find the story that’s been running your life and change it to what you were actually made for.

• Limited to small groups (15 people max)

• Online and in-person dates

• Free until the end of the year

You must apply to attend, and also note which date you are planning to attend.

APPLY HERE —>

For the person who needed to hear this today…

You don’t have to go there. You don’t have to spiral.

You have more options than you know.

What will you choose?

I was extra spicy in September, from talking about nude sunbathing to chemtrails, parasites, problems with aging, and my controversial post on feeding teenagers. And I’m having more fun than ever. Partially because I’m finally stepping into owning my gifts, maybe for the first time ever.

For far too long, I’ve lived as a shell of me, attempting to exist based on how I thought I was expected to show up.

And it was one of the most draining things in my life. Naturally, it is when you get sucked into a path of trying to live as someone you’re not. It’s so confusing and exhausting.

But I also realized it doesn’t have to be that way. I just have to step into my gifting, which is partly creating space for you to share your thoughts, ask your questions, and open up conversations we should be having but often aren’t.

To highlight a better story. And this month, I’m committing to not only keeping it spicy, but offering space for us to converse. I think October is one of the best months of the year (and arguably one of the most productive).

That is why my intention for the month is to get clear on what I’m working toward, while also enjoying the days and knowing slow is the fuel for fast.

October story edit:

You know I love story work and think it’s literally the foundation of all change (if you have a terrible story, no matter how much you force change, your life will end up back in the same place, even if it’s in a new enviornment).

Which is why I want to present a better story… or a story edit for you to contemplate this month.

October Story Edit: What would change if you stopped living out of the worst thing that happened to you?

I’ll expand on this more throughout the month, but I want you to contemplate it. Can you imagine what it could look like if the main character of your story was no longer:

• the shame

• the addiction

• the body weight

• the disease

• (you fill in the blank)

This is controversial, but I think we’re letting (even encouraging) people to stay stuck in their problems, calling it trauma, and making them assume it’s okay not to be okay and to stay that way.

Not because I believe we can’t be “not okay.” But because we have to stop letting people believe that’s all there is.

So consider this permission to return to being okay. Permission to change the story from the worst thing that happened to you, back to what you were made for.

** Don’t miss this!

Before we dive into this post, I want to remind you: if you’re interested in story change work… and editing the story to stop living out of the worst thing that happened to you or the thing you hate, and move toward what you were here for, make sure you join a live workshop.

Let’s be real, we’ve all got a few chapters we’d rather skip. You know the ones we summarize in therapy as “it's a whole thing.” The Freedom Story Workshop is where you finally open that dusty draft folder, look at the plot twists, and realize the story isn’t over, but it's asking to be edited.

This is where we stop talking about it and actually do it. Here’s exactly what you’ll get:

THE FREEDOM STORY FRAMEWORK: The process I used to stop living out of the worst parts of my own story.

YOUR OLD STORY, RENAMED: We’ll uncover the story that’s been running your life, and the evidence you’ve been creating to keep it true.

YOUR PAST, RECLAIMED: I’ll show you how to edit what’s already happened so it no longer has the power to maintain its role as main character.

YOUR NEW STORY, WRITTEN: You’ll leave with your new story, anchored in action, and ready to be lived.

SMALL GROUP, LIVE: Workshops are limited to 15 people (both online and in person). This allows for real conversation, tailored support, and a safe, intimate setting.

PERSONAL CALL: You’ll also get personal calls with me to help process the information, create reframes, and nudge you forward.

The best news: it’s free through the end of the year! You do have to apply, and make sure you note which date you’re planning to attend.

APPLY FOR A FREEDOM STORY WORKSHOP HERE!

October Mind Edits:

Every story I live starts in my head first. Just like yours does. And if I’m honest, my mind can be really good at replaying the worst parts on repeat. That’s why this month’s mind edits are all about telling myself the truth and giving more options.

This month my mind edit is asking myself: Is there a different way to see this (besides assuming the worst).

I’m not talking about a fake-positive, slap-a-smile-on-it way. Just a different way. Another option. Because the moment I have more than one way to see something, the old story loses its grip.

Here’s what that looks like for me:

When I want to degrade my body in the mirror, I’m going to ask… is there a different way to see my body?

When my husband doesn’t respond the way I want, I’m going to ask…is there a different way I could see this? Maybe he’s just tired. Maybe he needs some love.

When my kids push back, I’m going to ask… is there a different way I could communicate with them? Is there something they need but don’t have the words to ask for?

When my day doesn’t go as planned, I’m going to ask… what was here for me to learn today? Maybe it’s information. Or maybe it’s just a hard day, and that’s all it is.

Try it this month. The next time your mind jumps to the worst-case version, ask yourself: Is there a different way to see this?

October Soul Edits:

I’ve been reading through the Gospels (I got a little behind in Hannah’s Gospel reading challenge), but a few things keep standing out. Belief wasn’t just a mind process. It was also an action.

Over and over, the people who experienced Jesus didn’t just believe something in their head. They did something with it.

• The friends of the paralyzed man carried him to the house, climbed up on the roof, and dug a hole in it to lower him down (Mark 2)

• The woman who had been bleeding for 12 years left her isolation and pushed through the crowd to reach for Jesus (Mark 5)

• Peter stepped out of the boat (Matthew 14)

• The servants at the wedding filled the jars with water (John 2)

• The man at the pool picked up his mat (John 5)

What I’m trying to say is, belief moved. It got up. It went before it saw. And I think that’s where the miracle happens, not just in belief but in the faith to move before you see it.

This month, I’m asking myself: What would I do today if I really believed God was in this? And then doing that thing, even if it’s small and imperfect.

October Body Edits:

Listen before I fix. My first instinct is to fix. This month, I’m asking my body what it’s actually asking for first. Before I run to a quick fix, I’m going to trust the nudge my body gives me, the inner knowing that I need.

Prioritize Energy Fills. That means as much sun as possible, an earlier bedtime, daily movement (preferably during daylight), and a shift in my diet (more fat and less carbs).

Warm meals and drinks. Ice is out, friends. I hate to say it, but your body really thrives on warm foods and drinks this time of the year. Think stews, soups, porridge, hot teas, and absolutely no ice.

Consistent morning routine. As the days get shorter and the weather gets less predictable, your body thrives on more structure. Keep a semi-routine schedule. For me, that looks like a consistent morning routine this month.

What to cook when you don’t feel like cooking this month:

1. Spinach and Sausage Gnocchi with Sage

2. Smoky Butternut Kale Salad

3. Creamy Tuscan White Bean & Kale Soup

4. Pumpkin Chili with Cornbread

5. Chicken Pot Pie Stew with Homemade Biscuits

6. Korean Beef Burritos

7. Slow Cooker Beef Stroganoff

8. Pumpkin Spice Banana Bread (made in a blender)

9. Blender Oat Pumpkin Muffins

10. Baked Cinnamon Pears with Greek Yogurt and Granola

My October Inspiration:

I LOVED this book my mom gave me to read last month. My oldest is reading it now, and all I want to do is hike the Camino de Santiago. I also really loved this book my friend recommended, and now I’m on to another one she wrote, The Bright Years.

If you’re a podcast listener, I really loved this episode.

Ever since I went through my mold journey, I’ve been a big fan of changing my sheets regularly. These flannel sheets are on my to-buy list.

Just because it’s getting cooler doesn’t mean your hydration needs go down. In fact, the cold, dry, windy weather can pull a lot of moisture from your body. Keep yourself stocked on electrolytes. My go-to right now is this brand (and of course I love LMNT).

My friend gave me a mug of this tea to try, and it was so good! Give me all the apple spiced flavors right now.

My October Energy Fills:

• Slow-cooker meals

• Lamps over overhead lighting (especially with these bulbs I swear by)

• Flannel sheets

• This apple spiced tea

• Movies in bed

• Honest conversations

• Getting dressed up for dinner out

• Vaseline as my moisturizing routine

• Nude sunbathing, even when it’s getting cooler

• Heavier strength workouts

What are you loving, reading, or buying lately that you love? I’d love for you to share your October finds below!

Leave a comment

List out your intentions this month, and you’d be amazed at how a bit of direction makes a world of difference.

Catch up on these!

Here are some of the best things we posted this month!

“I’m thinking about starting a parasite cleanse and wondered if you had any experience?”

“What are your thoughts about chemtrails and EMF’s. I’m actually so terrified by what’s going on in the world and just need some peace of mind.”

I’ve gotten an uptick in these questions lately. Whenever someone asks, I assume many others are wondering the same thing and just aren’t asking. And because I’m not short on opinions, I’m always happy to share them.

Here’s the deal: I don’t really believe the stereotypical “hype,” or rather, “fear.” At the same time, I love a good conspiracy theory. So I’m giving you both my actual thoughts, backed by my own research and experience (because a parasite cleanse almost killed me), plus my conspiracy that is about chemtrails, but at the same time, not.

I also threw in the Vaseline thing, because I just really need you to know something about Vaseline.

I know this post might ruffle some feathers, but my heart is to cut down your fear. The fear we’ve built into the health space (and the stress of trying to be clean) is hurting us. It’s having the exact opposite effect of what we hope.

If you want to be well, you have to come to your place of peace with these topics, and that starts with understanding the root of all disease.

Keep reading to get:

• The root of all disease (it’s so simple we like to overlook it).

• My views on parasite cleanses (and the health-influencer who almost died from one).

• The chemtrail and EFM conspiracy, and what I actually do about them.

• My thoughts on Vaseline (the question no one asked, but you need to know).

• The bigger problem may be what you think is “clean.”

Read more

Life is CONSTANTLY humbling me. I swear, just as soon as I share or teach something, I get humbled on the back end. Making me ponder if I really know anything at all.

It’s probably why I’m most skeptical of people who have it all figured out. Because if they do, friends, I’ve got a lot of holes in my life.

I think about this often. When you share work o…

Read more

Apparently, I’m getting a little spicy here. Boobs in the sun and now this.

I promise, what’s happening here was a culmination of events that led me to scrap what I originally wanted to share today (we’ll save that for next week) and land here instead. Because WE’VE GONE TOO FAR.

And somewhere along the way, we missed the point entirely.

This week, one …

Read more

I never really envisioned myself telling anyone about my nude sunbathing experiment that turned into a habit. But here we are.

I also never imagined how strong the pull would be to bathe my boobs in the sun. It’s like a weird instinct takes over when the sun’s out and you just want to take off your shirt. Obviously I have restraint. I said it was an urge, not a reality.

But it goes to show how much my body craves it (more on how my biology has actually changed below). This post is about so much more than nude sunbathing. It’s actually about the story I’ve created about my body, and how that story has rubbed off on my girls.

That’s why I’m giving you all the details about how sun on my naked skin changed my perspective of my body. And it even changed something in my kids, which is the most shocking part of this whole experiment.

Honestly, I think this is a conversation we need to have more of.

Serious question (and this might be too far, but…): If we’re not allowing our kids to see our naked bodies in safe spaces, how are they learning about their changing bodies? They’re getting it somewhere.

Now, I know how some of you might feel about talking about nude bodies. And I promise, this isn’t a sexual thing… although we’ll talk about that. Because this is a “sensitive” and vulnerable post, it will be subscriber-only.

Here’s a quick look inside this post so you know what you’re getting:

• Why I started nude sunbathing

• The pattern interrupt it created in my story about my body

• The changes I noticed in my body/breasts (I feel weirdly like I need to impart some professionalism here 😉)

• The creative ways my husband has kept this practice alive

• Contemplating living in a topless society (joking… mostly)

• Talking about bodies with my kids & the changes I’ve noticed in them

Note: Please proceed only if you’re willing to keep an open mind and have a friendly conversation. If you’re here to pass judgment, please note that you’re wasting your time.

Here’s the thing: This conversation isn’t really out of character for me. It’s more me than how I’ve shown up here. And I don’t want that anymore. I’ve played small and secure, when naturally I’m kind of spicy. Or, better said, I’m actually really curious.

AND even more than that, I think it’s important we have/create safe places to talk about such topics. Because not everything needs to be sexualized, and even if we’re having conversations about sexual things, that doesn’t mean it automatically needs to be vile, gross, wrong, or objectifying.

SEX IS NORMAL. So is NAKEDNESS.

Unfortunately, our world has just distorted good things and made them bad, and now we are living in a world of extremes.

I get it. As someone who was hurt at a young age by our oversexualized world, that distorted my reality for a really long time. After doing work to heal that story, I’ve realized not everything needs to be, or is, sexual. Even if our world swings wildly between oversexualizing and undersexualizing, completely missing the middle ground where things are just normal, safe, and pure.

My own freedom story has led me here… talking about the things we need to talk about without feeling weird about it.

My experiment with nude sunbathing was nothing other than pure. So let’s get into it, shall we?

Read more

Yesterday, I told you why I suck at being a health coach. Not because I’m bad at helping people; I’m just back to problem-seeking and fixing. Because what I really believe, the problem was never the problem. It was just information. And most of what we call a problem is really just a product of an old story controlling the narrative.

Anywho… today I wan…

Read more

Diary Confession: I suck at being a health coach.

Strong language, I know. But it’s the truth. I’m terrible at telling people what to do, and I’m even worse at convincing myself it would work if I did it.

For a long time, I chalked that up to just being “bad with people.” But in most cases, I’m not. I love people and deep conversations. Village is part o…

Read more

Last week, I shared a message from my friend. Maybe we need to start a new series, Life Advice From Friends… Isn’t it wild how wise they can be? I firmly believe we all need people in our lives who are close enough to know us, but also outside our situation enough to keep us on track.

Friends are great pattern interrupts. Spiral stoppers. And that’s why…

Read more

One of the greatest story edits I made in my life was the understanding that, on this side of eternity, life wasn’t a chase to a destination. It was an opportunity to show up, live, and grow.

Life is always a verb, not a noun.

I was recently listening to a podcast, and the guest (Zach Bush) said, “Trees aren’t “trees”; they’re treeing.”

I know that soun…

Read more

I would be lying if I didn’t think about trying peptides, because I’d be lying if I told you I was 100% content with where my body is. I’ve made so much progress, and yet why is it that our desires are always for more?

Thoughts on peptides have been living rent-free in my head.

It’s not just the results people are getting. It’s also the fear of missing o…

Read more

We all have different strengths. For instance, I’ve realized some people are really good at organizing their cupboards and drawers, and some of us aren’t.

One of my friends brought this to my attention. In her words, and I quote, “I realized we’ve been friends for a long time, and I never opened your cupboards before. So I just did.”

“Annnnnnnnnd???” I re…

Read more

I met a new friend the other day. I say friend lightly because we talked for maybe four minutes max. But I’ve already decided we’re going to be friends.

It started because I may or may not have unintentionally eavesdropped on their conversation and overheard her friends say, “I can’t believe you’re going to be 80.”

This made me whip around so fast I nearl…

Read more

The summer I took a pause. I fully embraced the in-between.

I’m talking about letting weeds grow where I thought I needed to rush to finish the landscaping because I still don’t know what I want the landscaping to be. Buying the “on-trend” monochromatic shorts and tank outfit even though I’m not fully sure it’s my look (and I’m also not sure my legs are …

Read more

You know how I feel about biohacking tools. I think they’re great. But I also don’t think they’re step one.

I came across this great post by @Jordanmatthews31, and I may have said "preach" out loud to my phone in a public place:

“I don’t know why we’re talking about: biohacking, CGMs, insulin spikes, cold plunges, peptides, supplements, and optimization.…

Read more

Get the unofficial fit of the summer! Take part in the Living Well merchandise and snag a high-quality tee, perfect for your morning walk or dressed up with a pair of jeans.

Grab your shirt here.

Read more

Your brain is already predicting the future.

Right now, as you read this, your brain is doing what it always does, predicting the future. Or at least attempting to.

Research has found that 70% of our thoughts are attempts at predicting the future. Not simmering in the past, but building assumptions about what’s to come.

You know what they say about assum…

Read more

Have you ever made a decision that actually changed things?

I’m not talking about the kind you’ve made a hundred times before, where you write, do the thing and feel good for three days, and then quietly let it go. I mean the kind that hits different. The kind that lands differently and where something actually moves.

I’ve spent time trying to understand the difference between the decisions we make to do the thing and those we don’t. I’ve been trying to figure it out for years.

While there may not be a specific formula, I think there is something worth noticing.

The difference between making the decision and sticking with it and making the decision and just talking about it is the willingness to be open to options.

It’s the willingness to be open to options you haven’t considered yet. Even open to the possibility that options exist.

For most of us, myself very much included, we approach change as if it were a straight line. If I walk every day, I’ll lose the weight. If I increase my protein, I’ll build muscle. One decision, one path, one expected outcome.

But life doesn’t move that way.

And neither does your body. As frustrating as it feels, I think this is exactly what you have been looking for.

Last year, I opened up to more possibilities.

And some of these possibilities, I would have flatly rejected two years ago. Things I was sure weren’t for me. Even approaches to health I’d quietly dismissed, like ketosis.

Yet, what I found on the other side of that openness genuinely changed how I feel in my body, not just physically, but in the deep, sustainable, this-is-finally-working kind of way.

I wanted to share that with you because things are finally working.

But first, my June goals. Because I think the way I’m setting them this summer says something important.

My June goals are:

1. Make the good choice, THE EASY CHOICE.

2. Sunshine every day

3. Daily walks

4. See the good in EVERYTHING

5. No AM carbs

6. Slow down

7. Less screen time, MORE PEOPLE TIME

Here’s what I love about this list: I’ve defined what each one means, but I’ve left open how I’ll reach them.

Take walking, for example. The measurement is doing it daily. But when I go, how long I’m out or what it looks like on any given day can vary. That allows me to take control of what doesn’t need to be controlled and let my actual life shape what I need in it. It’s been such a game-changer. Not just for the habit, but for how I feel about the habit.

And that’s the standard I want to invite you into this summer. Start treating your body from a place of respect for what it does for you and what you want it to keep doing. Not punishment or pressure. Just actual care.

Before We Go Deeper…

Truthfully, one of the most underrated metabolism tools I know isn’t a supplement or a diet protocol. It’s something that helps you reach a metabolic state, and that comes back to energy.

The most powerful thing you can do for your body is always, first and foremost, the basic things like sunlight, sleep, and movement.

Before you diet. Before you supplement. Before you make a major life change like quit your job, charge your body battery. Because the charge of your body changes your thoughts.

Which is why I’m pushing you to walk.

I know you’re probably over listening to me talk about it. And it sounds too simple. But here’s what I’ve come to understand: movement, especially consistent daily walking, changes how your body uses food.

It changes your metabolic state by improving insulin sensitivity, it supports your mitochondria, it regulates your nervous system, and it creates the kind of baseline charge in your body that it needs to make every other healthy decision easier to make.

That’s actually why the Summer Walking Club exists.

It’s not really a step competition. It’s not a fitness flex. It’s a 3-month community challenge built around one of the most powerful things you can do for your metabolic health, and doing it together, which research consistently shows makes consistency more likely.

If you haven’t joined yet or if you’ve been on the fence, this is your nudge.

The doors close this Sunday! Come walk with us. Your metabolism will thank you.

Now, to get back to the macronutrient shift I didn’t see coming but I 100% don’t regret, might shock you, but I also hope it inspires you.

The rest of this post includes:

• The big macronutrient shift I made

• What that looks like in my daily life.

• The first real steps to becoming fat adapted

• Five actual breakfast ideas I eat with this macronutrient shift feel completely doable

Is for paid subscribers. If that’s you, keep reading. This is the part I’ve been most excited to share.

The Macronutrient Shift (I Didn’t See Coming)

About halfway through the Summer Walking Club last summer, something shifted.

I started feeling charged. I was energized in a way I hadn’t been in a long time. And with that energy came a kind of determination that helped me realize my diet was the last piece holding me back from feeling truly good in my body.

Read more

I feel like we should talk about the slow Saturday morning for a second.

You know the one. Back porch. Steaming mug of coffee. Sun coming up. Birds chirping. Quitness…

I’m going to need you to hold that image very loosely, because I’m about to wake you up to reality for most of us.

For a lot of the people I know, and honestly, for me, the slow Saturday mo…

Read more

Can I be honest with you for a second?

I have days where I genuinely love moving my body and eating healthy.

And then I have days where I want to protest the entire concept of physical activity, couch-rot, and scroll until my thumbs give out.

Sometimes both of those days happen within 24 hours of each other. Which is exactly what happened to me this weeke…

Read more